Just bought a beautiful Pottery Barn sofa for the upstairs in the cottage, which is sort of a bedroom/sitting room.
I realized that my father should have a say in what goes down here with refurbishing this 250-year-old building that was filled with ancient memories that needed to be put away and let go of.
We took out 2 sofas, a bed and bedframe, a dresser. There was a fifth item that I can’t remember because it is all already so let go and gone that I have forgotten it. This stuff had been in use across a lifetime in three homes, two in New Jersey and this one and was so bedraggled and torn up by the cats it all just had to go.
My son was a heroine addict under this roof. He stayed here for about 4 years. Then, his cats were here alone and the I moved in after a horrible suicide attempt by me and a year and a half in extended acute care, et cetera.
This is what I am working on here. People thing my father and/or me are crazy for all the spending going on here because I am doing it online.
My appearance and nerves are such that I don’t want to go out.
Everything that was bought was fully necessary to turn this lackluster old place to brand spanking new modernity. With the back drops of the old 10 foot wide fireplaces downstairs and upstairs and some genuine historic items from the barns.
So, I splurged a little on the lamps. Everything else was a moderate price.
Here there are echoes of Laura Ingalls Wilder, which was my favorite reading as a child. In school, I loved 1) learning about the native Americans; 2) the lions in Africa; and 3)
I can’t remember the third thing, it is late at night.
This place was unsafe for my son and I am clearing out all the deadwood. That has been my primary goal for the past about a year and a half. In the hospital I went to Berks County Prison in my mind and made it better for him. It was a crazy time but I am practicing “radical acceptance” as I continue to brave this situation for the benefit of myself, my son, and others who take an interest in our family.
For reasons that I do not understand, once again my son and I are
I
Un.Bon.Mot 