over time the debacle of my stay at Hopkins became progressively more physical as my mother disdained me, restraining orders were filed, and the emotional stress and the climate in Florida were too much for me. I was so ill. My treatment of Ian was shocking. In ways that I couldn't control. And this pained … Continue reading HOPKINS: the physical impact
Category: America
pain-taking; 2
Then, there's the physical pain, largely unreported. it started with Chelsea, last week. she gave me cortisone shots for my knees. I am largely out of torturous agony for the first time in 25 years. it affected my whole body. There's a story there about falling on my knees, over and over., Sle,ep has been … Continue reading pain-taking; 2
pain-taking
I won't do it any more. I fight back. I remember saying a long time ago that In the 80's it was about "farming out the pain." my father used to say it. my pain at that time was future-oriented. I had no idea where I was going or what I was doing. 8n 5he … Continue reading pain-taking
MH World
Roe v Wade is down. My personal interests in that regard are personal now. Re racism: yeverywhere I go I see black men and women happy and in recovery. the cause that I thought would be my last is now first. When first asked, I disdained. That was on a psych ward in Tampa where … Continue reading MH World
Alien world
I'm a thinkling. that's my status in alien world. humble and small. recently I heard "walk in love" on the radio and I adored this expression. we humans on this earth during this pandemic are thinklings walking in love. we have been led to question some certain basic things about our society. surely the Lord … Continue reading Alien world
in the wake of the Queens death…
it's been a jumbled up time. I was in the midst of buying appliances and everything down to a freestanding countertop to make the place truly livable. I have been stuck here for 4 years in a condition I now recognize was abominable. Where there is no supporting physical structure, your mind, heart body and … Continue reading in the wake of the Queens death…
Finally!
it is clear to me and if I'm wrong then Im wrong, that my mother IS STILL LIVING. and that my brother IS NOT. they were able to match his teeth to his dental records. my mourning, then, was not ridiculous and if he is still out there and he's laughing this off he's a … Continue reading Finally!
About Aliens
oh and one other thing about paintaking and aliens. from my next to last post they selected me for this: how much pain an ordinary human being could suffer without breaking, my father and his cohorts were doing this to me thriugh acutely frustrating me with my laptop.before I left at the threat of gunpoint … Continue reading About Aliens
Sad news
the death of Queen Elizabeth is such sad news. I talked to her in my head all the time to keep myself English. I could see her face, sometimes, so beautiful and wise. She wouldn't have wanted to acknowledge the likes of me!!! but she did. Because she was the queen. And she knew to. … Continue reading Sad news
breakaway
They are controlling me. Issues Been doing it for a long time. My father sells it. I just heard a little two-tone chime in my left ear like the recurrent pretty chime the tablet sends out regularly. Now I really know. I also know to honor my father (and mother). I also know to stand … Continue reading breakaway
Un.Bon.Mot 