Clozaril

It's a miracle drug for people like me with "toxic brain syndrome"--who have been run through the mill with every kind of anti-psychotic medicine and anti-anxiety medicine and anti-epileptic medicine and other psych meds--from one doctor after another and on one psych ward after another. Well, that is my profile. I've been one of the … Continue reading Clozaril →

Egoism

I knew about the Japanese before I started to write about them that they are a highly egoistic culture. As I remember the religion is Shinto and I don't know anything about it even though I pursued Asian studies for a year in High School. I got blown out of the water myself after that … Continue reading Egoism →

When I was little

We vacationed in Maine one summer. My brother was catching mackerel as fast as he could put down the line. He took them off the hook and I banged their heads with a hammer. I don't know why. Did someone tell me to? At the river we went to one time in New Jersey, I … Continue reading When I was little →

Abt My Mother

I have to beg for indulgence toward her, I am thinking that she is still living. Please remember the picture I painted of her that I saw of her in my mind, running through a deep forest in a flowered dress terrified of being skinned alive by natives. It was so horrifying to me. I … Continue reading Abt My Mother →

Trap

It's one thing if I get myself into a sick trap, I can handle it. My brother and I practiced this when we were young. I do NOT want to be responsible for putting my old friend A in one. Please understand this. My father had guilt issues over not being a soldier in WWII. … Continue reading Trap →

Yes, Sick Work. More Sick Work

I realized that my friend A would not be responsible for it, she would be a victim. Recently I found out that I was a very strong person. The lesion on my face irritatingly sapped my strength all my life. I tired after the least exertion. When I came back here after the last hospitalization … Continue reading Yes, Sick Work. More Sick Work →

Sick Work

This is sick work, but it has to be done. Now that I have been able to relinquish the pitiable condition with which I have been enmeshed in the WORST SUFFERING since I was in my late 20's, I can turn my focus to the cause I planned to pick up two years ago, along … Continue reading Sick Work →

Lack of Training in America

Lord, help us all with our lack of training in America, especially with our words! We come here from other countries trying to fit in. I felt lethargic and stupid and left out at best, an ugly mess at worst. What is the American language? It is constantly being redefined. There is money in this. … Continue reading Lack of Training in America →

Johns Hopkins

The malpractice of Johns Hopkins University Medical School Affective Disorders Unit is responsible for the chaos in Washington. Lipsey mentioned how they would follow me when I left and they did. I was in numerous situations significantly close to the government through my ex's work in Silver Spring, MD including work in the Beirut government … Continue reading Johns Hopkins →

CATS

This is my logo. My personal logo for me. It was supposed to be a logo for my business website but I don't know whether or not I'm going to get there so I'm passing it around generally as a meme. A meme for me. I just adore it and I pray that my reader … Continue reading CATS →