about Arab terrorists

there is the one I call “snowflake”—the original—the worst. because of how cold they are—how clean, how perfect, how enticing to an impressionable mind who has had enough of the sinful nature in American society. There are three religions who go to Yahweh: Jews, Muslims, and Christians; and Christians will always win in the end … Continue reading about Arab terrorists →

Judaism

Am I Jewish on my mother's side? I wish I could verify this in some way. There were so many things that seemed to lean in this direction. I settled to embrace that I am but I have no Jewish formation (that is a Catholic word so...?) )? Is this rude to Jews who practice … Continue reading Judaism →

Today

Today I was very drowsy all day long, more so than I would have expected after returning to Clozaril after just a week or less off of it. I just forced myself up off the bed (it is 7:48 p.m.) to get up and come here to post And I will stay awake until at … Continue reading Today →

Abt My Mother

I have to beg for indulgence toward her, I am thinking that she is still living. Please remember the picture I painted of her that I saw of her in my mind, running through a deep forest in a flowered dress terrified of being skinned alive by natives. It was so horrifying to me. I … Continue reading Abt My Mother →

over the ocd

Thank God. I just realized it. This is real. This should be WORLD NEWS!!! I'm over the OCD. I was finally able to express it as a "disorder of my reflexes." It was like I was watching myself think and move and getting stuck. A doctor in California called it "anxiety reactive" and I took … Continue reading over the ocd →

pic of me becoming who I really am

it was so exciting to see. me without the mole/wart as I said, I have been in the cosmetic phase for the last several weeks, I figured it would take about 3 months. This is just a glimpse. It goes with a picture that I do have somewhere, if I can find it I will … Continue reading pic of me becoming who I really am →

Mother Advocate Finally Rests

no more wars Actually this would be how I was AFTER I recovered from my stay at the Horsham Clinic last year, at that time I was the "core on two stilts, a face neither man now woman; and how the ALIEN4 (thats what I called him at the beginning) turned me into a flesh … Continue reading Mother Advocate Finally Rests →

Angel or ALIEN

just one tiny ignorant little worm at the heart of this. but... the most spectacular vast wings of light, multiplex, crystalline, the size of a few buildings but on outer space terms. poised in the sky in my mind Friend or foe?

embarrassment

Sometimes one bad thing solves something worse/ I ran to the front door in my skivvy nighty with a corduroy short covering it because I was waiting for a delivery that I was afraid my father would refuse the delivery. He was stuck out back and didn't have time to do anthing. It is a … Continue reading embarrassment →

Letter to my son

I am sensing in your mood that you are hearing some bad things from people who knew me at Kent and Harvard and other times. I am very sorry for this. Sorry that people are telling you and sorry that those things happened. There were a lot of people taking advantage of me and leading me down wrong paths and … Continue reading Letter to my son →