I didnt expect to be back so soon, it was gruelling to post that last post on a cell phone. The typos get insane. Once again the smoke shack unsettled me: Big J. of the size 16 (20?) shoes was out there alone. I lit up my cigarette.Then I realized he was making slight grunting … Continue reading Sexual addiction
Category: Mental Journeys
Immanence
Subtitled Very Important Post Problem on the smoking porch continuing to be resolved alongside my OCD, and the DO, DO NOT voices with inception when I was refusing Zyprexa yet taking Topamax, the Topamax I am taking again now. I remember saying to myself on the psych ward, 1, i can't die for my cat … Continue reading Immanence
UTI plus
It turned out I was super constipated too. Generally these days i have to use a suppository for constipation about every 5 days and this time I went 6 days and last time I didn't go enough. So I was feeling a little boggy as well as being immobilized by the UTI. God bless my … Continue reading UTI plus
UTI
Why am I so friggin stupid. I dont take myself seriously. My inner voices TOLD me not to go to partial program, i went anyway, and i cried and i didn't kniw why. My therapy session felt like a waste and i didn't know why. The smoking pirch got way out of control and i … Continue reading UTI
Feeding Frenzy
Male Residents P. And K. were out there on the picnic table benches in the slight, drizzling rain openly harassing me inside the smoking shed. Female resident T. was talking to someone else out there and minding her own business, she is usually kind or at least neutral. How mean can people be. So I … Continue reading Feeding Frenzy
Big J.
Big J. on the smoking porch is out of line. This man has the mental age of his shoe size which is even more alarming because they must be about size 16, this man is HUGE, and he throws his weight around, that's what he's doing now. His size wins out over any rational argument. … Continue reading Big J.
The Answer–Live for Christ
I didnt get it right away. How silly of me. God has saved me from death and brought me to new life. I didn't bother to ask Him what I should do! Live for Him of course!
Victory, Victory in Christ
Well one victory was long in coming, i had to learn about forgiveness, and my son helped me too: you can't control others, he pointed out. I was very afraid of giving over sexual territory becsuse of my history, but now I have "the new innocence, " and when the male resident B. got close … Continue reading Victory, Victory in Christ
Cutthroat–silly of me
There's a woman here who has the better of me through the men. Something went down about a "gang bang." She was standing talking to little J., who isn't here any more, i just realized. And i walked in. Their eyes were locked. Then he turned to me. In the end something was said about … Continue reading Cutthroat–silly of me
Not going well
My turning over a new leaf here is not going well. I had a bad monent with the nighttime security guard that reminded me of how badly i was treated in my earlier stay here, and i had the feeling I wouldn't be able to let it go. And just now the two different men … Continue reading Not going well
Un.Bon.Mot 