Betrayal

I finally found out that my sister seduced my husband. I always knew she dissed me to him. So, she never knew it but for that reason I dissed her to her old boyfriend's sister--the one who "ate condiments for food"--when we were out on the patio smoking that Thanksgiving that his family came here … Continue reading Betrayal →

Turning over a new leaf

That about says it. I have; I am. I realized that I had a terrible, even insulting habit of negativity in my everyday speech. I rapidly was able to let go of this, once I saw it. with the Lords help. Since then, I have been making all kinds of positive strides. So, as I … Continue reading Turning over a new leaf →

Finale, 2

At the house in Summit, New Jersey, my little sister--8 years younger--told me she had a dream that she was drowning in mud. I took rhis very seriously as I was deeply engaged in ineffectually pursuing imaginary psychoanalysis based on the book, "August" that my psychotherapist had given me to read. It was about a … Continue reading Finale, 2 →

Cambridge, Mass. 1984

I did something horrible. Even as I come here to write, I am being made aware that at that time my sexuality issues werent understood as such and it was terrifying to be me. I picked up wirh Barry, a young poet from Lancaster, PA, wh had come to Harvard Square seeking Literature after a … Continue reading Cambridge, Mass. 1984 →

The truth is always better than a lie

My father thinks that I want to have sex with him. He thinks that all women secretly desire to have a sex with him. Maybe all men are like that. I couldnt know, because of my injured clit from being kneed in the crotch as a child. In college I hit my boyfriend on the … Continue reading The truth is always better than a lie →

Connecting the Dots; updated

Well, its been a long time; but the water is finally well over the dam. Since Wernersville State Hospital in Berks County. PA, from a situation in 1988; where they didnt know me and I was held on a bunch of lies that I didnt even know. Then, I spent 2 years here in semi-recovery; … Continue reading Connecting the Dots; updated →

Phone Preference

I figured out a lot of things by realizing that I was a "hi-tech brat." I had a college roommate who was a self-proclaimed "faculty brat;" "similar to a military brat." The issue of "phone preference" came up with her. My father was a hi-tech professional and was also an AT&T employee and my mother's … Continue reading Phone Preference →

Update to last night’s post, “Misperception vs. Reality”

I became a stalker in South Central Florida. I posted about the Nurse Practitioner gyn person; we were pleasantly "invited" to Florida with a good job offer, but after we got there we were beaten all to hell. It was me of course. In my mind I was still dealing with the diffIcult and deleterious … Continue reading Update to last night’s post, “Misperception vs. Reality” →

Misperception versus reality

So, in Florida I tried to see a gynecologist in about the 3rd year we were there. I saw a sign, I dont now remember where, saying "A Place for Women." So, I called them up. I went in for my appointment; I filled out the paperwork. For the "date of my last gyn visit" … Continue reading Misperception versus reality →

About Dr. Boutin in Fla

I had a lovely, childlike romance with Dr. Boutin that was forged out of my insecurity and pain. I didnt even want that. It was all very confusing. The moment I first saw him it was like I saw a ghost: slim, elegant, good-looking, well-dressed male psychotherapist I was reeling from the blow of a … Continue reading About Dr. Boutin in Fla →