I am way ahead of where i left off in my last post. I have put up a private post about repentance of the bad things IVE done and how Saran is fuelling my preoccupation with the faults of others against me to blind me to my own faults to keep me from repentance and … Continue reading Sinful nature–healing
Category: Uncategorized
The Whole Problem
ByThe problem with this situation is a minor stroke my father had just after my son was born. He also had a urinary incontinence problem. My mother was responsible to handle both. She made the decisions and he signed off on them. The stroke, involving damage to visual processing in one eye, caused hin to … Continue reading The Whole Problem
Reading about sexual abuse
On Wednesday my therapist gave me a book on sexual abuse by a Christian author. It is very good and has already sugnificantly touched me. This comes at a time when there is a flip flop going on where they are being self righteous and i am being selfrighteous. Well guess who is right? My … Continue reading Reading about sexual abuse
See my last post: awaiting execution
"[As i look back over my life...] I was just another part of the dance. Its all i ever wanted. " With that i could wind up my blogging career or change the subject. When i was a young girl in high school nobody wanted to dance with me.. I remember the song "Dance With … Continue reading See my last post: awaiting execution
Awaiting execution; updated
Thats what i feel like. Nobody liked my post about masturbation. Its an unpleasant subject but its a huge chunk of ny history. A different subject, equally insidious, is the fraudulence of my pos ftture as a "Hutton" (not its real name) literary grad. I dont have even the most rudimentary grasp of English or … Continue reading Awaiting execution; updated
Overload
Well i posted here today, and i texted my son, and i emailed my ex and i didnt get a single reponse anywhere. I am so to the limit with tension and stress here with my parernts that i feel like im about to explode. All of a sudden the day was done and all … Continue reading Overload
Coming soon; “California, a Pro-Life Novel”
I never thought it could happen. Along with everything else going down today, the process of the abortion(s) has struck its final note. I was driving home from late morning bloodwork, listening to Christian radio--thanking God that i got out of bed--and suddrnly i saw the road stretching out ahead of me and i was … Continue reading Coming soon; “California, a Pro-Life Novel”
Other sexual sins
So now that i have funally repented of the ENTIRE SIN of masturbation in my life, other, gentler sexual sins are presernt to me, from my childood--things that my mother should have corrected and didn't . Tbey arose out of my disability, from being kneed in the crotch by my brother; and how it was … Continue reading Other sexual sins
Broken little left finger
Its about the littlest thing you can break. I said to the doctor, do we treat this or let it go? She said. "Oh yes we treat it." So i have a "cast" on it, an aluminum spongy stick that conforms to the finger and the side of my hand, held on by tape. Its … Continue reading Broken little left finger
Good News!
My ex is back in the picture. He helped me with cash to continue to pursue my book publishing, it was delayed at the last moment by an inexcusable typo in the cover text, it was awful to have to resubmit the whole thing, i could have let the 4 interior typos go; but sending … Continue reading Good News!
Un.Bon.Mot 