Quality of life Issue

Every so often it comes down to things that are really basic. The suppositories make my butt ache. It doesn't quit. It aches all week long and right now, after using it at 4, it's still excruciating. My roommate and i are exchanging suicudal ideation. I haven't explained to her about the suppositories. This is … Continue reading Quality of life Issue →

UTI plus

It turned out I was super constipated too. Generally these days i have to use a suppository for constipation about every 5 days and this time I went 6 days and last time I didn't go enough. So I was feeling a little boggy as well as being immobilized by the UTI. God bless my … Continue reading UTI plus →

UTI

Why am I so friggin stupid. I dont take myself seriously. My inner voices TOLD me not to go to partial program, i went anyway, and i cried and i didn't kniw why. My therapy session felt like a waste and i didn't know why. The smoking pirch got way out of control and i … Continue reading UTI →

Feeding Frenzy

Male Residents P. And K. were out there on the picnic table benches in the slight, drizzling rain openly harassing me inside the smoking shed. Female resident T. was talking to someone else out there and minding her own business, she is usually kind or at least neutral. How mean can people be. So I … Continue reading Feeding Frenzy →

Big J.

Big J. on the smoking porch is out of line. This man has the mental age of his shoe size which is even more alarming because they must be about size 16, this man is HUGE, and he throws his weight around, that's what he's doing now. His size wins out over any rational argument. … Continue reading Big J. →

The Answer–Live for Christ

I didnt get it right away. How silly of me. God has saved me from death and brought me to new life. I didn't bother to ask Him what I should do! Live for Him of course!

Victory, Victory in Christ

Well one victory was long in coming, i had to learn about forgiveness, and my son helped me too: you can't control others, he pointed out. I was very afraid of giving over sexual territory becsuse of my history, but now I have "the new innocence, " and when the male resident B. got close … Continue reading Victory, Victory in Christ →

Cutthroat–silly of me

There's a woman here who has the better of me through the men. Something went down about a "gang bang." She was standing talking to little J., who isn't here any more, i just realized. And i walked in. Their eyes were locked. Then he turned to me. In the end something was said about … Continue reading Cutthroat–silly of me →

Not going well

My turning over a new leaf here is not going well. I had a bad monent with the nighttime security guard that reminded me of how badly i was treated in my earlier stay here, and i had the feeling I wouldn't be able to let it go. And just now the two different men … Continue reading Not going well →

Repentance

I come upon a place very different from what I thought. The Lord wont take me back to where i was early this morning where i saw my son and his suffering and how he felt about my book and my blogging. I caught a glimpse of it and then it was gone again. I … Continue reading Repentance →