Fearfully and wonderfully made

Abortion stinks. Its the worst thing. The Lord tells us we are "fearfully and wonderfully made." (Psalm 139:14--1.) My mother didnt respect this. She blamed me for her ectopic pregnancy when I was 5 years old. Or, that was what it felt like. She went to the hospital for it on my 5th birthday, and … Continue reading Fearfully and wonderfully made →

Safe

I am stuck here in a rant about my up n coming book, pending a years wait to organize my ideas and figured out how you write a novel. That would be after I get out on my own. Saw the movie about Mark Zuckerberg and Facebook last night, from 2010; was absolutely flabbergasted. Issues … Continue reading Safe →

Rift

Here there is a final rift with my father and I will be leaving; it cannot go another way. He is busted down to "traffic cop." I cant even remember now the reason but this fits. He had been going around everywhere having affairs with people in this head, even Sister M.; and my old … Continue reading Rift →

Sorry

Im sorry for all the people I hurt because of my sick sexual and emotional problems I had a bunch of human rights issues to solve in the MH world, race matters and the abortion industry. Also, I had a beautiful family to go to one day, a lovely husband and a son to raise. … Continue reading Sorry →

Smoking

So, in late 1989, I was sitting in my mothers garage in the old house across the way here. It was filled wirh filth, overflowing with garbage. Dead flies, oil and gas fumes. A dead rat and a dead bird in the refrigerator along with some ginger ale. I was a fixture there. I wasnt … Continue reading Smoking →

Sister M.

Well, this has been a bugaboo since the late summer of 2018, before my brother killed himself. I reported to my psychotherapist at that time that I feared that the nun who was counseling me for baptism was exposing me to unwarranted personal intimacy. Not sexual abuse; just an emotional affair. I understood that I … Continue reading Sister M. →

Road Kill

Its about Dr. Gross in Allentown 24 years ago. He just didnt understand. He saw it about the sexual OCD because I was carrying on with a male patient who had just been pulled from the river. Generally that's who I picked on, VULNERABLE PEOPLE LIKE MYSELF. Also because I had written a story about … Continue reading Road Kill →

So. Allentown

2015? I was back in my apartment after dinner there with my mother, father, sister and her then husband. My sister and I had both gotten the exact same red hair dye and pixie haircut completely independent of one another. She had asked my mother not to tease her about it. Something happened there, I … Continue reading So. Allentown →

About the OCD

First of all, Its going. After 33 years. Going back to when I really started coming apart, at the Lodge Program at Wernersville State Hospital in Berks County, PA, in 1987, when I was 26. Years later, I became acquaintainted with the Catholic Universal Prayer by Pope Clement XI which is very long and exhaustive. … Continue reading About the OCD →

Egg yolks

OMG im so sorry. I apologized to the community last night; but it wasnt enough. I need to explain myself. About the overdose, not in 2016. But the one in 2014 (?) (2015?) When I was living in South Allentown. My father had moved me there against my wishes. I had wanted to move to … Continue reading Egg yolks →