I mentioned in my last post about driving the PA roadways, back in the 80's in my Dodge Colt, drinking 10 large coffees and smoking "endless cigarettes." Well, there was a history to that. I remember drinking a couple of cups of coffee at the senior coffee house at boarding school, and totally freaking out … Continue reading Coffee
Re the cat Sasha
My father thinks that I need to know (for myself) what he thinks he needs to know to be a man. Towards this end, he is constantly punishing, teasing and twisting me. My sister, on the other hand, is perfect, sweet, a delight. They have a little romance. He likes to make that comparison. She … Continue reading Re the cat Sasha
Work in Progress
So, it is SICKENING, what I have to write about today. I have to go further back, before my child, before the lies and deception surrounding the marriage, before my child; when i was a REALLY, REALLY HORRIBLE PERSON. I drove the PA roadways for hours a day, drinking 10 large coffees, spilling coffee on … Continue reading Work in Progress
THIS JUST IN
OMG First of all, the cat, Sasha, i didn't explain to anybody what happened with the euthanasia because i didn't realize how important it was to get it said. Something untoward happened at the last munute on the way to the vet, an urgent care clinic at an unfamiliar location. I forgot to indicate as … Continue reading THIS JUST IN
Talking
Talked to an old friend last night. I haven't talked in years; ever. Dont know who to trust. My exhusband was one of the few NOT wordless people who was able to communicate with me. His French/German influenced Canadian with my Americanized British: he had learned as a youth in Europe how to be understood … Continue reading Talking
Lies and Deception. Updated 8/10/2020 4:30 pm
This post was just updated: First of all, its about the rape at the beach when i was 13. When i was living here in my 20s, they (my parents) (world's worst friends to children) said to me, obliquely, "It happened when you were 13." A few years later--i was still living here-- i mentioned … Continue reading Lies and Deception. Updated 8/10/2020 4:30 pm
Ulterior Motives
Poor Sasha! I just didn't know! The shocker was that her skin was falling off! The vet tech went to comb her back and her skin was falling off with her hair in chunks. The problem with this for me was that back in November of 2016 I made a suicide attempt of taking a … Continue reading Ulterior Motives
Gone With the Wind
Elizabeth Taylor. She always reminded me of my mother. Dark hair, a little husky, statuesque. I don't think I ever told anyone that. Nobody listened to things like that in me. And, moreover, my mother was a steeplechaser in her youth in England (See: "National Velvet,") So, on a different note, my mother also reminded … Continue reading Gone With the Wind
“Saying Goodbye”
Text to my son: "I didn't even see it; how this butterfly is granma, and she came to say goodbye to us. That she came to ME, to show ME, and everybody else that I LOVED HER, and she knew it. She just couldn't acknowledge it. Like, how to stay in fighting trim on a … Continue reading “Saying Goodbye”
Eyes
Horrible eye injury My son, Tampa Bay Area, 2009, I took off for England against my will with a briefcase style safe full of my meds and without a shower. My husband threatened me with the dread word "Canada,"--if I didn't go to England to help us emigrate there (I possesses U.K. as well as … Continue reading Eyes
Un.Bon.Mot 