Coffee

I mentioned in my last post about driving the PA roadways, back in the 80's in my Dodge Colt, drinking 10 large coffees and smoking "endless cigarettes." Well, there was a history to that. I remember drinking a couple of cups of coffee at the senior coffee house at boarding school, and totally freaking out … Continue reading Coffee →

Brother’s Suicide

Jeffrey Epsteins suicide is helping me make sense of my brother's. Since last November, when he did it, I have been wondering what the connection is between my frantic processing of the past, and this final act of my brother's. I had woken up that morning making a first time ever assertion in my mind … Continue reading Brother’s Suicide →

Red, raw eye

There was an updated version of this last post that somehow got lost. I hit the "update" by button and left it aside. Only later did i realize that it hadnt updated; and there was no record in my drafts. This was a terrible loss as this year's bad anniversary was combined with the commemoration … Continue reading Red, raw eye →

Uncomfortable

Everything is changing really fast and looking really good. I dont want to be benefitting from my brothers suicide! But, maybe that's what he wants. After 40 years, I am entirely OVER my suicidal thinking. And praying for 40 more years! I am up for it! I want this house. I always "poo pooed" it, … Continue reading Uncomfortable →