grqa What a day! My life has turned around on an apex I could never have seen coming. My son is talking. I had a horrible life up until his age, when I met his father. Then although it felt horrible it was beautiful. I thought I had the most beautiful mother in the world … Continue reading moving on
Tag: GRACE
Missing my ex
it took 10 years to be out of the relationship. I needed to change. I sent him emails every day and asked if it was okay. Every 3 months or so I got a one- word reply: "Yes." but I was very ill. I had a relationship in college that scratched the surface of where … Continue reading Missing my ex
New blog up and running
Un.Bon.Mot. I like it. I've been transitioning... I've been making a change here as reflected in the site title and also simultaneously it reflects the huge change in my life now free of nasty wart-mole. buying furniture and appliances as necessary for this place is fun! I was living as a cave creature. I have … Continue reading New blog up and running
The Manhattan Project
First of all, my death sentence ("there will be no reprieve") is way died down.I wrote about it my post the other day ("Lawsuit Against Johns Hopkins"). I said it was per God. I realized today that it was per my father, who I thought was "God" per an incident that I can't go into … Continue reading The Manhattan Project
MY JOURNEY HOME
I am at home for the first time since I was 14 years old. I had a baby by my father when I was 13. I was forced to abort him. His name was Arthur Ambrose. I was sent away to a boarding school and blocked it all out. I had a roommate; I won't … Continue reading MY JOURNEY HOME
GRACE
Ian,I wanted to tell you of the significant change that I experienced in the last few days.I finally realized all these things that were explained by an understanding of my sexual disability since childhood.The final and most important was my sick childhood feeling about Mother Mary, Grandad queered us so badly about religion but for … Continue reading GRACE
It all happened so fast
A paradigm shift. From Boston/Manhattan to Buffalo; 1982 to 1993. Englamerica to Canenglamerica. In 1978 I applied to Harvard, Princeton, Yale, Brown, Colgate, and a few other top Colleges. Yale had the sense to wait list me, after two questionable interviews. I got in everwhere else, on the strength of a phenomenal personal essay about … Continue reading It all happened so fast
Suicide live online day 2
Actually we dont know exactly when it happened. I am speaking of my going public here about it. He we t mussi g over 2 weeks ago and his body was found in daylight hours there the day before Thanksgiving. Its been a slow burn. Thus morning at the Starbucks drivethrough the person ahesd of … Continue reading Suicide live online day 2
Horrible
As this Thansguving goes down, my mither us still stealing my fire from long ago. Its horrible. She took a beating and all along shes hears something terrible happened to her. Meanwhile i got my tubes, my clit and my brain fried in the UCU and fell into a vegetarian stae. My mother was encouraged … Continue reading Horrible
Who woulda thought…?
Well here i am en pointe at 57---who woulda rhought it? Im backvat "Hutton, " age 17, 1979. To do a kttle tidying and re "point"ing. Arrived on campus for rhe furst day of Freshman week withoutva a change of clirhes, landed at Kingston airpirt and asked directions ti get to the subway and from … Continue reading Who woulda thought…?
Un.Bon.Mot 