I have let go of the Satanically inspired moment involving my two cats in my mother's kitchen back in the summer of 1997. I had been at the State Hospital. My mother and father had recently moved here (SE PA) from New Jersey. I had run away from the special program at the hospital for … Continue reading Cats; Satan; high-tech
Tag: State hospital
Prophets
It's about abortion. "I am the king of the world." "My name is David SON, S-U-N of GOD." I was constantly going to writing a novel called "Voices," I just liked the sound of that title. "My name is power." Uh hmm. (This is a patient from the state hospital speaking through me over the … Continue reading Prophets
Wondering
As i sift through my past in light of this new information--that my cat's pregnancy back in 85/86 traumatized me FOR A REASON; i am looking back on the stays at the state hospital during 86 to 88 with new insight. I understand that there was a reason for me to be there. The first … Continue reading Wondering
Cat complex
Posting from my cell phone because this is a sudden, intimate moment. Have been posting momentously, privately. Now, it's about the cats. Because now i see why i was so obsessed over my cat Daisy, getting pregnant when i sent her here from Mass. after relationship with roommate, J. in apartment there broke up in … Continue reading Cat complex
Miracle Day
I have been tapering off Clozaril, a powerful antipsychotic med; and adjusting to Nuplazid, a very gentle new antipsychotic med intended for Parkinsonian patients. It is very expensive and had to be approved by my insurance. I'm not sure whether it was my strange, Parkinsonian-like condition that made the doctor think of it for me, … Continue reading Miracle Day
Yellow Butterfly
Well I was sitting in the garden outside the conservatory, smoking a cigarette; pondering the mysteries. I saw a yellow butterfly flying up high in the trees; not a common sight here. I used to see them in Florida. Here, it reminded me that I am above the animals; specifically, the cats. I have been … Continue reading Yellow Butterfly
Back online
Our internet went out. It was the weather! I got a little paranoid but the Lord led me right: to let it go, and then I heard the whole house internet was out, it was the storm. I'm a step ahead! I can get a mobile hotspot in my cellphone. They have silly little flip … Continue reading Back online
Accountable for sexual abuse of self
Well the shit gets deep when you become accountable on account of what SOMEBODY ELSE does TO YOU. Your father expresses a sexual interest in you-- you are 17--that is your problem, regardless of the fact that it is not on account of anything you have done. With your mother it is like RAPE in … Continue reading Accountable for sexual abuse of self
Disconnect
Now i have a new disconnect. For 32 years its been the woman who got rhe better of me on a state hospital ward here in Pennsylvania after i landed here from tbe Boston area un 1996 when i was 24.  Now, its tbe coming down here from Mass. I was ib as osych ward … Continue reading Disconnect
Faith formation
As you move forwad in Christian faith--in Catholic Christian faith--things from the past that were imporant in your Christian formation become important. I was listening to a song on Christian radio on rhe way home ftom Sister M.'s "Because the cross has already won the war."Â It finally brought me to peace with the here … Continue reading Faith formation
Un.Bon.Mot 